My Shoes

When I lost Rhys, I had someone share this poem with me via *GASP* MySpace (are they even still around?) Today being October 15th – National Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day, and my constant reminders of my angels watching over me lead me back to this poem I have kept.

Just for those who do not know, today is a day to remember those little babes taken from their families lives through circumstances uncontrollable. If you would participate, a special and beautiful activity occurs worldwide on this day, called ‘The Wave of Light.’ Everybody lights a candle at 8:00 pm their local time and lets it burn for at least an hour. The idea is that with everybody lighting their candles, a wave of light crosses the entire globe through the day in honor and memory of those who have suffered a miscarriage or the loss of an infant.¬†

Now to the poem. The copy that was sent to me was indicated Author Unknown at the bottom, and to my knowledge that is the case. If you, or someone you know deserves intellectual rights to this, please inform me and I would love to provide the proper credit. The reason I love this poem is that it applies so perfectly to this situation, and it provides a new way of looking at it. Comparing the grief and pain felt when that woman loses her child to a lifelong pair of ill fitting shoes was a perfect comparison.

My Shoes

I am wearing a pair of shoes.

They are ugly shoes.

Uncomfortable shoes.

I hate my shoes.

Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.

Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.

Yet, I continue to wear them.

I get funny looks wearing these shoes.

They are looks of sympathy.

I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes not theirs.

They never talk about my shoes.

To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.

To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.

But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.

I now realize that I am not the only one that wears these shoes.

There are many pairs in this world.

Some women are like me and they ache daily as they try and walk in them.

Some have learned how to walk in them

so they don’t hurt quite as much.

Some have worn these shoes so long that days will go by

before they think about how much they hurt.

No woman deserves to wear these shoes.

Yet because of these shoes

I am a stronger woman.

These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.

They have made me who I am.

I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.

~ Author Unknown


  1. AJ
    Jan 8, 2014

    This poem is so powerful. I have shared it widely, both with mothers and with others. ;-} Thank you for posting it. Love you!

    • Ally Sylum
      Jan 9, 2014

      Absolutely AJ! This is still one I go back to so many times, and it is so strange that I have actually held on to this one so long. I think it is so very appropriate for the situation. All the little angels who have had to leave their families too soon are never forgotten. I love you too!

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